I believe in so many things. My faith, the core of being alive in walking by what I know and not what I see. Even if I don't know where my feet may fall, I still walk and believe my direction will fall before my mind can comprehend where I am. I don't always get it right, and I seem to venture into unknown and dangerous places for the sake of giving love. But I still trust that my journey has a meaning in some small way. I am too kind sometimes, my heart never learns when to stop caring or loving. My heart has the scars to prove it. And I'm proud of them. I know them each by name, I never forget. My heart is a home, a safe haven. Anyone is welcome to come live here. Even if you have left and gone away, you will always have a home to come back to. I could not cut you off, I do whatever is necessary to keep it from going that far. But life happens and sometimes it's necessary. I have this trouble in letting go. I've known it since I was young, since my heart first broke. I don't wish for people to leave my life. I want them to stay forever. Like a little child who holds onto their blanket for safety. It is necessary for certain happiness until it's taken away. Then we learn. Oh do we learn. I am so complicated, I don't understand myself sometimes and I fail to see why love is lacking in others. I wish to give it to whomever I can. I have so much to give. The risk of heartbreak doesn't phase me, it used to, but I'm stronger now and I'd rather get broken again just to have the chance to give a piece of myself to someone who truly needs it. I will always be complicated I guess and it's possible I will never learn or just choose to ignore. I could not apologize for being what I'm meant to be. I don't want approval anymore like I used to. I used to need it, and if I didn't have it I would change. I was so silly and naive, I didn't know how to be me. But now I am, and some days it's so hard to BE. All of this human, it's hard. To be compassionate and see the broken suffering and knowing I can't mend them. This life is so complicated and confusing. I wish it were different, happier. But I do what I can do be more for others. To give some sunshine where it is needed.